Saturday, March 15, 2008

Saturday Afternoon Palate Cleanser
Archaeologists Unearth Fossilized Jawbone
of Paleolithic Hockey Player
World's Worst Jobs #75
Nicaraguan Plastic Bottle Recycler
Tucker to Start Singing for His Supper
"I must say, I'm a little envious. If I were slightly younger and
not employed here, I think it would be a fantastic experience to
be on the front lines of helping this young democracy succeed.
It must be exciting for you in Afghanistan... in some ways
romantic, in some ways, you know, confronting danger. You're
really making history, and we chickenhawks say 'Thanks!"

Friday, March 14, 2008

A lion not cowardly, but pococurante.
Camille had been warned a 'blue norther' was headed in
her direction. But she went for a swim anyway.
According to those in the know, 'cheecoting' is a game
played by Italians who haven't yet lost their marbles.
Why didn't she listen when you told her the pool
was filled with hydrochloric acid?
Kibongo had just heard the United States government's
national threat level is Elevated, or Yellow. He was very
worried that terrorists might attack him before he had
a chance to vote for John McCain in November.
So many chickens came home to roost at the White House
'La Grange' had to be played around the clock to make
them feel at home.
Then Makes a Hasty Exit
Some people cross their fingers when they fib.
Other people cross their legs.
John Gibson, the Blond Bomber, KO'ed by Fox News

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Some men use physical force to have sex with
women. They are called 'rapists'. Other men
use monetary force to have sex with women.
They are called 'customers.' Rapists go to jail.
Customers go to the Mayflower Hotel.
The Unexpurgated Bible #11
"And when Adam saw that Eve was pleasant to the eyes, and
made him feel wiser than a serpent, he took of her fruit,
and did eat."
Training a beagle to wink is like teaching a politician
to lick his own balls: difficult but not impossible.
Michael O'Hanlon Adopts Another Slender-Billed
Vulture Orphaned by the Iraq War
Music is Ashley Alexandra Dupré's first love. When asked
what her second love was, she only smiled and gave the
sign of the Vixen.
Iraqis Carrying Coffin of 'The Surge Is Working' Propaganda Campaign
Jimmy Durante

Jimmy Durante's Dog

If Geraldine was a white man, nobody would pay any attention to her.
She happens to be very lucky to be who she is.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Macbook Air Banned from European Fashion Shows for
Having a Body Mass Index Lower Than 18
Dr. Laura claims that Silda Spitzer could have saved
her husband's career had she only read this book.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

It was the biggest 'two-two' the little boy had ever seen.
"Why is it called that?" he began to wonder.
"Sure, too much salt can kill you. But can you imagine
trying to set a land speed record if this were Bonneville
Pepper Flats?"
Official Lure of Washington, DC
Shaving was a damn bloody business before the invention of the

Party Says Beijing's Air Pollution Is Communist-Inspired,
Not Capitalist

Monday, March 10, 2008

Slow Day in the Chinese Parliament

To watch the skier fall on his ass, shake the snow globe vigorously.
New York Governor Busted in Emperor's Club
for Wearing New Clothes