Saturday, March 14, 2015

Exposed:  Bibi Netanyahu Target of
Vast Peanut Butter Conspiracy
Southern Talibaptist Leader Gets Hosed at International 
Association of Firefighters Legislative Conference and 
Presidential Forum
Find Them in the Biscuit Aisle
"Then I got down out of the boat, walked on the water and 
came toward President Reagan. But when I saw the wind, 
I was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Mr. 
President, save me!” Immediately he reached out and
handed me his family Bible."
Susan Brooks, the GOP's Blue Leather Girl, wants a 
'neutral arbiter' to rummage through Hillary Clinton's
 email in search of the legendary Black Beast of 
Benghazaaaaarggh!
Get this man a wet nurse, STAT!

Friday, March 13, 2015

Warm Scuzzies #540
Jason Villalba
He began to worry when he saw that the penis transplant
surgeons were wearing binoculars.
"Look, I did the best I could in the Washington Post to
polish the turd dropped on the Republican Party by
the 47 Senators who signed the Iran letter authored
by Tom Cotton, that  37-year-old Arkansas hayseed.  
Give me a break!"
"'King Cotton'?  You have to admit it calls to mind the
 South of aristocratic planters, beautiful southern 
belles, poor white trash, faithful household slaves, 
and sweaty field hands.  In other words, Arkansas
in the good old days."
Who in his right mind would 'rehome' his adopted
daughters with this guy?  That's correct:  Justin Harris.

Justin Harris Sez:  "Sure, I have big
hair.  It's because I have a big head.
In fact, my whole body is wider than
a party barge."
"Hello, I'm Barbie and I want to learn more about you.
So talk to me and I promise not to tell The Elf on the Shelf."
If your donuts look a tad sunburned, it may be because
Dunkin has stopped putting sunscreen on them.
Warm Scuzzies #539
Justin Harris
When it considered today's GOP, the Bald Eagle wished it 
had hands so it could do a proper facepalm.
Jason Voorhees Joins the 47 Traitors in Wishing You
a Very Merry Friday the 13th

Thursday, March 12, 2015

World's Worst Yobs #324
Ian Tuttle
"'Twixt the Optimist and the Pessimist
the difference is droll.
The Optimist sees the donut,
the Pessimist sees the hole."
Breaking News Mashups #11
'Lindsey Graham's First Act as Prez? 
Eat World's Oldest Pretzel'
Warm Scuzzies #538
Rodner Figueroa
Tehran Tom Salutes America!
Remember the Neutron Bomb?  It killed people but saved
their property.  Well, meet Neutron Tom: he kills people
but saves their kitty cats.
First there was Pig in a Blanket.

Now there's Dog in a Mummy Bag.
Dweebs, Dorks, and Doofuses #67
Tom Cotton
Bobby Jindal Sez:  “Maybe I’m not what they think a 
conservative should look like.”
[Could be, Bobby, could be.]
It was only fitting that former Congresswoman Michele
Bachman be given a cameo role in Sharknado 3, for she 
had been the only Republican who could juggle two 
sharknadoes while speaking in the Capitol rotunda.
Meanwhile, in the Texas Lege

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

"How am I supposed to 'step down' when I'm so low the
bottom looks up to me?"
Tom the Mutant Mecha-Turtle
Cheeky Joke
Ah, that spunky Adolf!  He knew where
 the bodies were buried.

Sign of the Times #64
Discount Grocer, Discount Subversive
It's no accident they're called 'Red States'.
GOP Blames Obama for Taking 20,000
Breaths Per Day and Riding a Trike as 
Child
Did Russian mobsters steal Tom Cotton's identity and sell
 it on the black market to Iran?  Is he the 'Manchurian
Candidate' for our time?

Tuesday, March 10, 2015

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #615
Beauton Gilbow
Flag Desecration #85

Monday, March 09, 2015

Warm Scuzzies #537
Ronald Brockmeyer
"We Republican hardliners have harder lines than those
Iranian hardliners.  Back home, they call me the Ayatollah
of Yell County, Arkansas."
Here's the Scoop on the
Walmart Watch:  It Tells Time, It Talks
to You, and It Costs Only $10.88
['Nuff said.]